Shirt Happens

My new Obama-Biden shirt arrived, finally!! Yes, the one that I complained about and eventually called American Express to dispute the charge. It arrived the other day, no explanation, no apology, in an undated envelope. As t-shirts go, it's nice, but I'm pretty sure it's below Sarah Palin's standards. Pity it's not really t-shirt weather here anymore. Anyone at the Obama Store want to send me a fleece or a sweatshirt instead?

Thanks Barack, and good luck on Tuesday.. And thanks Amex, for lighting a fire under their asses to get the shirt sent.

Election 2008

I thought for sure I'd have trouble figuring out how to vote on the various measures on the upcoming ballot. But I came up with a foolproof strategy. I am voting against whomever lies the most. It's just that simple.

Take Proposition 8 for example. The Yes on 8 people have run ads on TV that say that if proposition 8 is not passed, then gay marriage will be taught to kids in school. Interesting idea, but it's not true. Clearly they're trying to mislead me, so I'm going to side with the No on 8 camp.

And then there's Proposition 2 - it's all about humane treatment of farm animals. The No on prop 2 people have said that this will increase costs such that farmers in California will be put out of business, which would mean all of our farm animal-based foods would be brought in from out of state. The funny thing is, the eggs in my refrigerator now, at this moment are organic, from free range chickens in Petaluma, CA, so it seems that the No on 2 people are full of crap. I will therefore, vote Yes on 2. I'm guessing that this sort of thing is just fine for the No on 2 people?

And so it goes, down through the ballot measures. Thanks to everyone for making my choices easy this time around.

Sucks to be me

We bought a new vacuum cleaner the other day. Our old Sears Kenmore canister had outlived its usefulness. The wheels never rolled straight, the connector for the "Power Hose" stuck such that you needed a screwdriver to disconnect the recently replaced "Turbo Brush" attachment, and so on.

After a lot of online shopping and a couple of trips to local stores, we decided to get a Miele canister from Bed Bath and Beyond (I always think of Jay from Last Commic Standing when I think of BB&B). After using it the other day during housecleaning, I have to say, I think we made the right choice. It's leaps and bounds better than the Kenmore was. The parquet floor attachment is great on the hardwood floors (that was extra), the spinny upholstery brush is great (and gentle) on the furniture.

My favorite part is the vent (air gets sucked in through the hose, it needs to be vented out somewhere, right?). On the Kenmore, the vent was out the back. That was always annoying - if the vacuum happened to be facing the wrong way, it would just blow the dust around. The Miele people figured that out and have it vent out the top - no more blowing the stuff I haven't gotten to sucking around.

Bed Bath and Beyond though - arg. We decided to get this particular vacuum from them because we had a 20% off coupon (they send coupons weekly). What we didn't realize was that the coupon, in its fine print, excludes nearly every major (read "expensive") manufacturer. We walked up to the register with what would soon be our new vacuum, handed it and the coupon to the cashier and were told "oh, you can't use this coupon on this vacuum - Miele is excluded" and she showed us, in the teeny tiny print - they're excluded - bastards.

But we got it anyway - I think that's what they expect to happen - get people excited to buy something and then when they can't back down, hit them with the bad news. And it worked, but only this time - we won't be shopping there anytime soon.

Where the heck is my gosh darn t-shirt!

Way back at the end of August, the Obama Campaign sent me an e-mail - I could be one of the first to receive an Obama-Biden t-shirt if I made a contribution to their campaign. I bit. It was stupid, but I did. I sent them money. And I got an email confirmation. And nothing more. Seriously, it's now been more than five weeks, and I still haven't received my damned t-shirt.

I tried to be patient - I made it three weeks before I decided to call to see what was going on. I got the nicest woman who said something like "yes, they were delayed because there were so many orders; but we sent an e-mail to tell everyone they were delayed; the last of the orders went out on Monday." I pointed out that I hadn't received this e-mail; but she assured me I would receive my shirt, and then offered to transfer me to someone else who could help me further.

And maybe this other woman could have helped me, if she ever answered her damned phone or returned my voicemail messages. I left a couple of messages last week and heard nothing back. Nice, real nice. I hope when Barack wins, that he finds more responsive people for his cabinet than he has running his gosh darn Internet store.

I made lots more calls - once or twice a day. Sometimes I would call the number for the "store" that I found online, other times I would call the number of the non-responsive woman. I never actually talked to a real person.

Finally on Sunday someone actually called me back. After a brief explanation of the problem, she said "sorry, we're the Obama store, we don't actually handle those orders, those are handled by another group; you need to talk to this other woman, her number is ..." The funniest thing - this other woman's phone number is only a digit or two different from the first woman who didn't return my calls.

Nice, real nice. Unfortunately, I couldn't leave her a message, as her voicemail was full - maybe I'm not the only one who hasn't received my shirt yet?

And then, surprise surprise, another call, on Monday morning. From another very nice woman, but unfortunately, one who is challenged by simple logic. The dialog went like this:

Me: I was calling to see why I hadn't received my t-shirt yet.
Her: They were sent out last Monday, you should receive it by the end of next week
Me: [wondering where they were sent from that they take two weeks to arrive]
Me: Can you check on it?
Her: No
Me: What if I don't receive it by next Friday?
Her: If you don't receive it by next Friday, we will know and we will get in touch with you
Me: How do you think you will know if I don't receive it?
Her: We will

Ok, let's just stop there. You can't track it, but you will know I didn't receive it? How - through some sort of telepathy? Perhaps you will telepathically sense my frustration? Or will it be from the phone call you get from American Express when I call them to dispute the charge?