iSpeculate

It seems everyone is speculating about what Apple is going to announce next. Will it be an SDK for the iPhone, will it be a better MacBook Air - signed by Michael Jordan maybe?

No, it won't be any of that. They are going to announce the newest member of the iPod family, the iLash. It works like the Sansa Shaker - using subtle flicks of the wrist for changing tracks and volume. As always, Apple innovation shines through - the iLash uses kinetic energy for charging; a couple of violent thrashes are all it takes for hours of pleasure.