Rubberneckers

For those not familiar with the term, here's the dictionary.com definition of a rubbernecker:

rubbernecker: n 1: a tourist who is visiting sights of interest [syn: sightseer, excursionist, tripper] 2: a person who stares inquisitively v : strain to watch; stare curiously; "The cars slowed down and the drivers rubbernecked after the accident"

I live in California. It's a great place to live, but sometimes I really have to sit back and wonder what makes the people here "tick." We've got traffic, just like most other places, but most of ours is completely unnecessary.

There are the late mergers - you know them - they're the people who drive along in in a lane that's going away long after it actually has gone away in hopes of squeezing past one more car (a tip for you guys - odds of me letting you in in front of me are slim to begin with, but if you can't even bother to use your signal light, the best you're going to get from me is the finger).

And there's the color-challenged - you've seen them too - they're the people who mistakenly think the law about traffic lights says "if the light was ever green, you're free to go through it, extra credit if you're up on two wheels rounding that left turn."

And let's not forget the close cousin of the color-challenged, the block the boxers. They're to be pitied. They're not actually bad drivers, they're just bad at math. Most people are able to quickly decide whether their car is longer than the amount of space on the other side of the intersection; these people are not. These are the same people, I believe, who park SUVs in spots labeled "compact" - right, I know, your SUV is small compared to some of the others - yeah, let's go with that for now.

And lastly, there's the subject group - the rubberneckers. I just don't get them. They're driving down the road doing fine, not a care in the world. And they spot a car pulled over - maybe it has a flat tire, maybe someone's getting a ticket, maybe even a small accident - it doesn't matter what's happened, the rubbernecker needs to pass by slowly so he or she can take in everything - "Ahh, look there's some debris. And there's a bit of bumper over there. Wait, I think I saw some skid marks."

It happened to me the other night - I was cruising along the freeway on my way home, and there was a small accident which backed traffic up for miles and miles. Everyone wanted to see what had happened. My 20 minute commute became almost an hour (I know, I know, other people have longer commutes, but this is, after all, my blog).

Accepting that curiosity is part of human nature and that rubbernecking is just a perverse manifestation of it, I've come up with a couple of ideas that can possibly get rubbernecking off our freeways and into our homes where it belongs:

1. A passenger-side mounted camera that films accidents so the wannabe rubbernecker can pass by the accident at normal speed but still capture the accident scene for viewing at a later (safer) time. Maybe someone will even put together a repository of these videos - kind of a combination rubbernecking/voyeur thing.
   
2. A movie of nothing but accident scenes shot from the passenger window of a car. Now rubberneckers don't even have to be on the road to enjoy a good accident scene, they can enjoy it in the comfort of their own home - seated sideways though for a more realistic experience of course.

Honk if you're a rubbernecker..